Officially Our "Normal"

Today I learned that I have officially moved into the "normal" of having a daughter. Kegan had a doctor appointment with a specialist we check in with every year or so. While we were waiting to meet with the doctor, her fellow came in. I have not met this fellow before, but I knew she had read the chart because they are super thorough. I had not made an announcement about Kegan's transition but they knew to call her by the correct name (and did) based on the "alias" created by the universal e-record system several of the local providers share. (And maybe my polite reminder to the friendly, non-fazed receptionist.)

So the fellow came in and greeted Kegan by her correct name, we all exchanged the "Hello's" and "How are you's?" common in our world. The fellow then sat down and asked, "So, how are things? Any changes? What's new?"

I literally looked at her, paused, thought, and then replied, "Ummm, no, nothing really, no changes."

She looked at me a little perplexedly with a slight tile of her head, to which I looked back at her, and then after a few seconds, said, "Ooooooh! [insert awkward, "I am a clueless mom" chuckle] Yes, Kegan has transitioned."

Is it totally awesome that I completely forgot that this is kind of huge news? I am thinking that yes, it is totally awesome. I knew we had completed the "transition phase," but this just takes things to a whole new and better level.

The Waiting

I don't know how many more times we will have to do this...but I am seriously hoping it is not many. I just sent another email to a friend about Kegan being a girl. All the main players know, i.e., relatives, close friends, neighbors,  people who we see at least once a year. The people who needed to be told because we see them or talk to them frequently or at least frequently-ish know and have known. 

There are a handful of people who we keep in touch with sporadically who do not know. Some of them I may or may not tell...I guess it will depend on whether or not we "catch up" again at some point. Then there are the people who I count as friends, but don't manage to keep in close contact with. The people who if push came to shove I could call and get help with some crisis or who could call us and get help with their crises. So we are friends, but distantly, but in a pinch the distance would shortened dramatically if needed. Some of those people don't know. 

It feels weird to not know what the expected reaction is from them. I mean, if we are friends you would think I would have a good understanding of their outlook on many big issues. However, it seems for some of them I don't. Anyway, I just sent an email to a friend who I text with a few times a month, who I love and know she loves me, who has been there during other challenges in my life, and who I have helped her in difficult times. But we don't connect that often...partially because of physical distance, partially due to the crazy schedules of moms, and partially due to laziness, I guess. 

Anyway, I sent the email....and within ten minutes of hitting send I have refreshed my email two times, double checked that it sent, and checked for a text message from her. As well as sent her a text to tell her I sent an email (because apparently I am an old lady!). Clearly, she could not have even read the lengthy email in ten minutes, assuming she even happened to see a new email popped up! And yet...I will be neurotically checking and refreshing until I hear from her. Because that is how it goes...the waiting is long. It is just long.